Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Bad Places to Live on Campus: Forbes Addition

I’d like to share with you today a few insights into what is commonly referred to as one of the worst places to live at Princeton: the Forbes Addition. Now, as a dweller in said Addition, my personal experience hasn’t been terrible. Sure, there was a stinkbug invasion a few days back, causing my room to smell like stale feces, and the whole floor is perpetually too hot, but these are only minor details. In fact, my RCA commented that the entire Addition would still be standing after nuclear war. I can only see that as a positive.

Apparently my point of view is in the minority. A few weeks ago, I discovered the Room Draw Guide, where students from previous years describe the highs and lows of their rooms. I’ll now present a few highlights from my perusal of the Forbes Addition section. Funnily enough, three separate rooms claim the title for worst room on campus. (I apologize in advance to anyone who may be living in these rooms this year.)

A438

“Title-holding room for the single worst location on campus. Enumeration of its qualities (entirely con) is pointless as the only occupants will be hapless freshmen. To them I say: I feel truly sorry for you.”

A337

“there was that one time when a cockroach crawled out of the shower drain […] the rooms are right next to the bathroom and the cinderblock walls are deceptively thin, so you can hear when people use the bathroom. The bathroom has the smallest shower in the world, but at least now we have opaque doors. the first day though, the shower overflowed. one of the stalls is so small that only small asian girls fit in. if you decide to get a blacklight, you will surely notice interesting stains on the carpet, but it was not a problem because we got rugs! you should too if you know what I mean ;)!”

A418

“This room is awful. It has a linoleum tile floor and a lovely view of the kitchen garbage dumpsters. Every morning at approximately 8, 10, and 12 you get to be awakened by the garbage trucks coming and taking out the trash. It's AWESOME. Sloped ceiling, hot as hell in summer (yeah, heat rises), no elevator, small (rooms also get smaller as you go up). I hate this room. I am SO GLAD to be out of it. Whoever gets it next year- sucks to be you.

Possibly the worst room in the entire school. No joke.”

And, finally, this gem:

A424

“Ah, my friend. How I grieve for you in the way that only someone who has experienced this room can. As concentration camp survivors are the only ones who can truly know what it was like, so you and I, my brother, are among the few who can know the hell that is room A424."

Where do I start? How do I arrive at the ninth ring of the inferno?

Let me begin with some divine comedy: This room defies the laws of physics to both suck and blow at the same time.

Anyway, here's basically the breakdown.
Forbes: 10 suck points
Addition: 10 suck points
4th Floor: 5 suck points
Right outside the lobby: 543,323 suck points.

Every night is an obnoxiously loud night at the oh-so-conveniently located fourth-floor lobby. It's basically a contest to see who can be the most inconsiderate in the shortest amount of time. Good luck sleeping before 2 a.m. The equivalent variation for having to take this room is measured in billions of dollars.

In short, do whatever you need to do to get out of this room. Sell your soul; it will be a bargain.

On a side note, if you ever wonder what it would feel to have homicidal tendencies (for an entire floor of people), this is the place to find out.

Clearly, the Forbes Addition experience just isn’t for everyone.

--- Andrew Sartorius

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Die for the INN!!! (Even if it is the addition that kills you)

Anonymous said...

Aside from the awful location, these problems aren't unique to the Forbes addition.

ssartor said...

In 2 months you'll be glad it's perpetually hot:

http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601087&sid=amm7GJfWypJE