Guilty Pleasures Around Campus

By Morgan Jerkins '14

Since this is the time of the year where one reflects on blessings, I began to think about all the pleasant things that Princeton offers. We have the Writing Center to help us refine our papers, the McGraw Center for academic workshops, and language tables for, you guessed it---foreign language practice. But there are a few guilty pleasures about Princeton that I am more than thankful for:

1. Quesadillas w/ Chipotle Sauce at Late Meal: I know this is going to make myself look like a glutton, but the quesadillas at late meal are out of this world! I admit, I don’t really go to late meal as much as I should. But the times that I do go, I realize that late meal has some sort of inexplicable energy that I can’t find in dining halls. One evening, I wanted to try something different than the sushi or mac & cheese that I usually purchase. I ordered the chicken quesadillas. I told the chef that I wanted sour cream and salsa on the side, but instead she gave me sour cream and chipotle. I figured I’d be daring and dipped the tip of my quesadilla in the chipotle. I swear, I thought there was an explosion going on in my mouth! Even though I’ve lived in New Jersey all my life, I’ve never tried chipotle sauce. So folks, please, even if you are ever running over time on a chem lab or plugging in the hours on a paper, please go buy the quesadillas with chipotle sauce. It is good for the soul.

2. Study Breaks: Every single day there is a study break from Thai food to frozen yogurt to Korean food and much, much, more. Perhaps I am so excited because I am only a freshman but when I talk to friends from other schools, they are green with envy about this generosity. Not only can you fill your stomach but you can also mingle with people that you may not have seen all day—or all week.

3. Princeton Men—Sorry, I had to do it. Even though it has only been two months since my debut blog post, I have matured a bit since then. Patience has taught me a lesson. Now, Princeton dating may get a lot of flack because some guys are considered “cold”, “socially awkward,” “[fill-in-the-blank]”, but I made one great observation during a formal party recently: Princeton men can really work suits. In fact, they can work just about anything. College reviews underrate Princeton guys and paint a picture of homely nerds who are completely detached from reality. Regardless, I am appreciative and grateful.

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Sustainable Hypocrisy

Thank you to the Office of Sustainability, once again, for giving me something to laugh about. This time it is for taping posters made of A3 size high quality paper outside of every single person's door in Whitman and Scully who did not have the foresight to respond to an e-mail withdrawing from this otherwise automatic participation in the "Pull the Plug" campaign. Perhaps the green team just got confused and momentarily forgot that its goal is to sustain the environment rather than destroy it while invading dormitories and terrorizing students. I am not going overboard with the terror factor either. The posters threaten that any student who does not pull the plug on their refrigerators and televisions over break will have his or her name plastered on a list of shame in the entry of their dormitory. "All those who do not pull the plug in this hall will have their name listed in the entry way after recess!" Oh goody. I hope they highlight my name in pink because I have every intention of returning from break to a fridge full of cold sodas. Although I will take the time to recycle the poster.

-The Blogstress

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What Is Left to the Last Minute Only Takes A Minute

By Aaron Applbaum '14

In high school I had the nasty habit of leaving all my long-term assignments to the last possible minute. My work was pretty manageable; I could get away with procrastination and receive the grades I desired. I figured that my habit would naturally dissipate as my academic environment grew more rigorous. Surely, the positive influence of my responsible Princeton-peers would rub off on me and I too could be the diligent student I wished to be. I could not have been more mistaken.

The propensity to push assignments off is more ubiquitous here then at my high school (granted that my observations of students is from a sampling that constitutes but a fraction of the Princeton community). Just about everyone here seems to suffer from the same last-minute oriented disposition. The students of Princeton University seem to exhibit a very special blend of lethargy, ADD (often Internet induced), busy over-booked schedules and the proven ability to ultimately “pull it off.” I have spoken with students from every grade here and the overwhelming ethos seems to be that work is meant to be done as close to the deadline as is manageable. In the elegant and truthful words of my friend Lucas Baradello: “what is left to the last minute, will only take a minute.” Perhaps I should be disappointed that it may be too late to change. But then again, I suppose it is not wise to fix that which is not broken.

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Looking Out for the Little Guy

By Brandon Davis '13

In the context of No Fat Talk Week and other initiatives that tackle our society’s unrealistic expectations for female bodies, I felt it appropriate to address this self-image issue from the male perspective.

It’s been three thousand years since the time of the ancient Greeks, but our society still worships the kouros. Maybe the Greeks had the ideal male right. Maybe we really should be tall, muscular and gruff. But at five-feet, four inches and 125 pounds, I find this Brad Pitt look just as unattainable as a slightly overweight woman might find Angelina Jolie.

I wonder if I’m the only man though who glances at the covers of GQ or Men’s Fitness with hopelessness and helplessness. Men are taught how we should look just as much as women are – Disney teaches girls that they need a prince; Disney teaches boys they have to be the prince. And let’s face it: most of us are no Prince Charming.

There are, of course, plenty of advantages to being fun-sized. Just last Christmas, my nineteen-year-old self entered the MoMA for free on a ticket priced for sixteen-year-olds and under. No fake ID necessary.

Still, the little perks of being little hardly make up for a general feeling of inadequacy. It’s very hard to get any respect when you look like a seventh grader. Not to mention the actual seventh grader’s more serious self-esteem issues.

Our society makes many small prejudices that generally go unquestioned – against extra-buff athletes or tiny, blonde sorority girls in precept, for example. With the mini-controversy this No Fat Talk Week has created, I hope we can expand the debate about body issues and self-image to include the rest of us misfits as well.

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Public Safety searches for iPhone bandit

Public Safety is searching for a man who stole an iPhone from a student's room in Wright Hall Monday morning while that student was taking a shower, Public Safety officials said.

The male student left his room at about 9:30 a.m. to take a shower and returned 15 minutes later to find someone leaving his unlocked dorm room with his iPhone.

The suspect is a Hispanic or Latino man, 20-24 years old and was seen wearing a blue hooded sweatshirt and brown pants, according to a Campus Crime Alert sent by Public Safety. The man had short hair and was 5’3” to 5’4” tall.

“Detectives are actively working it and hope to get some feedback from the community,” Public Safety Capt. Donald Reichling said in an e-mail.

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The Links Between Judaism and African Culture, a Discussion with Rabbi Eitan Webb and Dr. Cornel West

By Morgan Jerkins '14

As I sat in Frist 302, I saw Dr. Cornel West and Rabbi Webb walk in together with friendly countenances. I knew that this event was going to involve unity and cordiality. Jacob Loewenstein ’11, the Vice President of Chabad, set the tone with his quirky rules, such as calling out instead of raising hands. Dr. West and Rabbi Webb faced each other for a few seconds until Dr. West took it upon himself to start the lecture. A late-night conversation around a dinner table inspired Dr. West to fully convey how his whole being derives from the “prophetic, Judaic tradition.” Rabbi Webb, his “Jewish brother” represents the wisdom, knowledge, and connection of Judaism.

Rabbi Webb began his speech with the definition of a Hasid while Dr. Cornel West looked on, enthralled, and nodded his head with each statement that Rabbi Webb made. Their voices projected sheer enthusiasm, passion, and experience. Their gesticulations helped me to see the progression and fluidity of their dense philosophies. What kind of human being would you like to be? Dr. West looked out into the audience as he posed this inquiry. It was the only question that was not met with an astute response. When the Q & A began, the audience hesitated to ask a question; with impeccable timing, Loewenstein justified this silence by stating that the audience was overwhelmed with the wisdom of the two speakers.

Not only did I did learn about the idea of catastrophes within the works of Kafka and Shakespeare, the vicissitudes of life, and Yiddish proverbs, I felt enlightened as a human being. I do not need to reiterate how powerful Dr. West and Rabbi Webb are as speakers, but I will write this: I was not just sitting in on a lecture, I was on a journey.

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Columbia Professor Arrested for Incestuous Relationship with Daughter

By Lucy Cobbs '14

Columbia University professor David Epstein was charged with third degree incest with his daughter on Thursday, according to the Columbia Daily Spectator. The sexual relationship between 46-year-old Epstein and his 24-year-old daughter had apparently lasted for three years and was consensual. An exchange of “twisted text messages” between the two was discovered, said the New York Daily News.

Epstein, now on administrative leave, is married to another Columbia political science professor, Sharyn O’Halloran. A 2008 Spectator article about academic couples who “bring love to work” featured the pair. However, Epstein’s Facebook relationship status was recently updated to “single.”

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Cate Edwards '04 to Marry Trevor Upham '03

By Suchi Mandavilli '14

A few days before Elizabeth Edwards died, her daughter Cate Edwards ’04 told her the good news of her engagement to longtime boyfriend Trevor Upham ’03. Upham, a physician, and Edwards, an anti-discrimination lawyer, started dating at Princeton and continued their relationship after graduation.

Elizabeth Edwards died Tuesday after a six-year battle with breast cancer. At Elizabeth Edwards’ funeral service Saturday, Cate delivered a eulogy in which she called her mother a “lighthouse to all,” and Upham acted as a pallbearer.

The couple got engaged after spending Thanksgiving weekend in the Edwards’ home in Chapel Hill, N.C. According to People’s report of a close friend, “Elizabeth was thrilled.”

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Spotted: Ice Tiger in front of Dillon

From the USG FrostFest

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Sports Series- Remembering Princeton Sports from the 1950s to the Present

Over the next 10 days, the Prox will be recapping one year in Princeton sports from the 1950s. Why? Well, as we near the end of 2010, why not take a look back 60 some odd years and see what sports looked like before many of our parents were born. We start, unsurprisingly, with 1950.

By Hilary Bartlett '12

Though the tradition of sportsmanship and excellence remains unchanged, Princeton athletics in 1950 barely resemble the Princeton athletics of today. Though certain sports teams like football and basketball were comprised of committed athletes in 1950 as they are today, Princeton also fielded teams in smaller, lesser-known sports on a much more casual basis. In many ways these teams operated similarly to Princeton’s current club sports, which have informal practices and fewer competitions.Sports like polo, riflery, cricket, and box lacrosse cropped gained University support in an era of Princeton athletics defined more by the “casual, all-around sportsman,” than the highly-competitive, single-sport athlete.

1950 marked the first full year of competition for Princeton’s budding rifle team, for example. The squad competed in “postal matches,” according to a 1950 issue of the Daily Princetonian, which means that all firing was done on the team’s home range and results were communicated to opposing teams by mail to determine the winner. Harvard was the only Ivy League school to outshoot the Tigers at the William Randolph Hearst National Rifle Matches, where Princeton placed 18th out of 73.

In more conventional college sports, however, 1950 was a very successful year for Princeton. George Chandler ’51 captained the Princeton Football team to an undefeated season in which Princeton won the Lambert Trophy as the top team in the East and was named the national champion by leading polls. Dick Kazmaier ’52, the future Heisman Trophy winner, was named an All-American for the 1950 season, and Princeton head coach Charles Caldwell ’25 was elected National Coach of the Year.

Men’s basketball won the Eastern Intercollegiate Championship in 1950 and to demonstrate the team’s balanced play, for the first time in history the entire starting line-up won the B. Franklin Bunn Trophy, the annual award presented to Princeton’s most outstanding player. Princeton’s 1950 offense became the highest-scoring unit in school history with 1307 points in 23 games and its five starters were known as the “iron-men” for their strong play.

As I was rummaging through Daily Princetonian archives, I found a letter written to the editor by the “iron men” that requested “the Undergraduate body to refrain from booing opposing teams and referees at basketball games.” Though the level of competition in college sports across the country has increased since 1950 and Princeton itself has moved away from cultivating the “casual, all-around sportsman,” Princeton’s 1950 men’s basketball team exemplifies the combination of athletic excellence and sportsmanship that Princeton will forever strive to instill in its student-athletes, regardless of the decade.

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Columbia Drug Bust

By Caleb Kennedy '14

Five Columbia students were recently busted by the NYPD for allegedly running a drug ring on campus. The narcotics task force that brought them down, entitled Operation: Ivy League, alleges that the frat boys sold undercover authorities $11,000 worth of marijuana, cocaine, Aderall, and LSD. Chris Coles, Harrison David, Adam Klein, and Jose Stephan Perez are all 20. Michael Wymbs is 22. Authorities say these deals went down at the Columbia fraternities Alpha Epsilon Pi, Pi Kappa Alpha, and Psi Upsilon. Their specialty was LSD painted onto Altoids and SweetTarts.

The five were arrested this morning for possession of half a pound of marijuana and $2,000 in cash. NYPD also arrested five of the dealer’s alleged suppliers, one of whom allegedly plotted to kidnap and torture rival cocaine dealers.

In response to the drug raid, one Columbia fraternity has updated a posting of their agenda to include "Don't sell drugs out of the frat house,” with a note attached adding, "Adam should have followed this rule."

This comes following the October bust of two 18 year Georgetown students for allegedly attempting to create a meth lab in their freshman dorm and distribute the drugs. Authorities said they found such items as dry ice, ammonia, lighter fluid, and a turkey baster in the room and described the scene as "potentially highly flammable and explosive."

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Dear Angela Hodgeman and the Office of Sustainability,

Dear Angela Hodgeman and the Office of Sustainability,

On Monday, December 20th between 9 a.m. and 4 p.m.: There is no way in hell University personnel and students will enter my room to do a sustainability survey. The staff will check each room (except mine) for energy savings. All surveys will be visually performed and no personal belongings will be touched. Except for my stuffed animals, which you and your sustainability cronies will probably molest. Furthermore, there will be NO PENALTIES OR FINES for anything visually observed during the survey. Except the trauma my clan of radioactive hermit crabs will feel when you separate them from their mommy. You say my presence will not be necessary during the survey? Well, your presence will not be necessary in my room, thank you very much. Actually, you know what? How's this for a deal. If I let you into my room to judge its sustainability, then you let me into your room to do the same. And have no doubts that I will be judging you personally for each plastic bag, each gratuitous rubber band and can of soda I find in the joint. If you do not wish for me to personally enter your room and adjudicate on your private space, you can opt out. But I hope you don't. Please email iseestupidpeople@princeton.edu - stating your building and room number and that you wish to have your abode skipped over – If you email by 12 p.m. morning of Friday, Dec 17th, I will not enter your room and hide under your bed. If you have any questions, please contact sustainordie@princeton.edu.

Thank you,

The Blogstress

The email sent at 10:43 AM on Dec. 9
Subject: Sustainability Audit

This email is being sent on behalf of the Office of Sustainability. Please do not reply to this email.


Dear Undergraduates,

On Monday, December 20th between 9 a.m. and 4 p.m.: University personnel and students will enter all rooms in your building to do a sustainability survey. The staff will check each room for energy savings. All surveys will be visually performed and no personal belongings will be touched. Furthermore, there will be NO PENALTIES OR FINES for anything visually observed during the survey. Your presence will not be necessary during the survey. If you do not wish for University personnel and students to enter your room for this sustainability survey, you can opt out. Please email sustain@princeton.edu - stating your building and room number and that you wish to have your room skipped over – If you email by 12 p.m. morning of Friday, Dec 17th, the staff and students will not enter your room for this survey. If you have any questions, please contact sustain@princeton.edu.

Thank you,

Princeton Sustainability Office

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As Long As It's Sustainable...

Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

Happy almost Thursday, go kill some puppies in bio-degradable bags! It's not being mean, it's being green.

-The Blogstress

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Professors Blame it on the A a a a a alcohol

Personally, I'm all for shooting a few back with my professors. Nothing like a round of Bacardi 151 to take the edge off grade deflation. But Jacques Berlinerblau, associate professor of biblical studies at Georgetown University, stands between Professor West and my game of flip cup. On Dec. 5, Berlinerblau wrote a helpful blurb for the Chronicle of Higher Education, absolutely not based on personal experiences, outlining the dos and donts of professorial drunkenness. He warns his colleagues:

"Students are better at this game than you are. Getting Professor X to do vodka shots will be an awesome, transformative, even educational, experience for them. For you, it will be the single most humiliating experience of your career. And if you disregard my advice, rest assured that picture of you holding a red plastic cup in one hand and a copy of Kingsley Amis’ Lucky Jim (upside down) will be posted to YouTube."

Berlinerblau suggests that professors refrain from drinking with their own graduate students, although randos they might meet at the zoo are fine. Also, when possible, drink heavily at other universities rather than your own. But seriously, professors, how do you want to be remembered by your students? The guy who made each two hundred person lecture for thirty years buy his book from which he assigned a 10 page long reading, or the super fun professor who drank beer before liquor before grading a paper?

-The Blogstress

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Essay Exchange Attempts a Revolution

By Kash Rajagopal '14

The college application process seems remarkably straightforward: craft your personal statement into a ticket to one of the nation’s most prestigious universities. The essay is a window into your soul…really just a simple litmus test by the ad-coms to ensure you’re sufficiently accomplished, but humble, well-balanced but impassioned. Naturally, your essay should aim to be poignant but certainly never mawkish, and show how you, young wunderkind, have grappled with life’s unanswerable questions. Cheers!For the few that don’t find this request particularly transparent, www.EssayExchange.org provides some clarity. The website serves as an application essay bazaar, where students can learn from successful essays. For a meager $7.50, students can read previous essays accepted by Ivy League schools, Stanford, and MIT. Its founders, Harvard Business school alumni, wanted to “level the playing field” in a world of $40,000 private tutors and test-prep agencies. However, CEO Rory O’Connor wants to inform colleges around the country about his website and collaborate with them to ensure students don’t Turnitin to a plagiarism hotspot. O’ Connor believes his blossoming website may just revolutionize the college admissions process.

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All Around the Ivies- A Free Verse Poem

By Sohee Khim '14

Dartmouth’s Psi Upsilon fraternity has been charged with a felony for serving alcohol to a minor. Under New Hampshire law, Greek organizations are considered to be corporations—they up to $100,000 in fines.

Cornell’s early applicants for the class of 2015 have decreased by slightly less than 4%, breaking the upwards trend.

According to a poll conducted on Brown's campus, 84.1% of students had consumed alcohol and 41.8% of students had tried pot in the last semester.

Smoking is now banned within 20 feet of any university building at Columbia, a compromise from the original resolution that called for a 50-foot ban, and for many senators who supported a full ban.

Yale will be replacing their international studies major with the global affairs major, with a “focus on policy-making and practical experience” which, unlike the old international studies major, will be allowed to stand alone (currently, the international studies major can only be completed as a second major).

For the first time, students at UPenn will not have to constantly log on to Penn InTouch, their version of SCORE over winter break to check grades, but instead will receive them by email. The service is being provided after the undergraduate body unanimously voted to pass a resolution urging the university to institute such a service.

Human developmental and Regenerative Biology, a concentration implemented fall of 2009, is one of the more popular biology majors offered at Harvard, with 95 sophomores and juniors. Biomedical Engineering, introduced this past fall, is less popular with just 13 sophomores.Type rest of the post here

And Princeton is absolutely perfect in every way.

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Changing Things Up Since 1650 in the Harvard Corporation

By Catherine Ku '14

The Harvard Corporation, the governing body of the Cambridge school, has added term limits and additional members in the first major reform since its founding in 1650. The changes come in response to faculty and alumni accusations of a lack of communication between the corporation and the Harvard community.According to a report of the Governance Review Committee, the body will increase the number of members from seven to 13 and institute a term limit of six years with a maximum six-year extension. Numerous committees will also be formed from the corporation to expand the “breadth and depth” of particular issues.

While Harvard’s corporation will remain the smallest of that of its peer institutions, the changes will make the it more similar to the other governing bodies.

By comparison, Princeton’s Board of Trustees numbers anywhere from 23 to 40 members with three categories of trustees. The Board elects Charter Trustees and Term Trustees to terms of 10 and four years, respectively while alumni elect 13 Alumni Trustees to four-year terms. A member of the senior class and a Graduate School alumnus are also included on the Board.

The Harvard Corporation’s division into committees reflects Princeton’s current structure. Currently, the Board divides into ten subcommittees, which address issues ranging from student life to university resources. Additional committees are created when the need arises.

Harvard hopes the new changes will lead to increased transparency and flow of ideas between the governing body and the University.

“The fact is that all parts of the University have been asked to look themselves in the mirror, reassess how they might do their job to the optimal degree, and it’s only natural that we should do the same thing,” Corporation senior fellow Robert D. Reischauer said.

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Firestone = Epic

By Nathan Mathabane '13

I entered the lower levels of Firestone Library for the first time today. I’ve always heard people say “Oh yeah, I’ve spent most of the day deep in Firestone,” but until today I could only imagine what they meant. If there’s one thing that I will take away from this day spent in the depths of the library, it is this: Firestone is one of the most outrageous buildings I have ever entered. From the miles of ancient tomes that stretch throughout its bowels to the hundreds of cozy blue cells that form a prison-like matrix across the B and C floors, Firestone’s accoutrements surely mark it as a ludicrous lair of learning. There are nooks and crannies in that place that probably have not felt the tread of a human foot for decades. My friend and I joked that we could likely fall asleep in some remote region of the library and not be discovered for hours. How crazy is that?

Aside from the sheer area of the library, its age and upkeep further add to its absurdity. Some of the doorknobs were obviously installed more than half a century ago, in addition to some of the curiously faded pictures on the walls. I passed by an elevated view of 19th century New York and couldn’t help but wonder, “Why the hell is this here?” The number of oddities one encounters is endless. In the span of just 10 minutes, I faced fluorescent light tubes, wooden swords, and even an abandoned drinking fountain. Yes, this drinking fountain was just hanging out on the floor in some forsaken hallway, who knows why.

All of these pointless discoveries have brought me closer to our University library than I ever thought possible. I went from viewing Firestone as some place of dread which swallowed undergraduates into its stone-cold maw to seeing it for what it really is: an epic architectural marvel which has been provided for our use. So, the next time that you find yourself in Firestone, take some time to look around. You might never leave.

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Think Twice About Tweeting and Applying for a Government Job

Linking to WikiLeaks could cost you a government position. Columbia University's School of International and Public Affairs (SIFA) forwarded an e-mail to their students Dec. 2 with a warning. Posting WikiLeaks on social media sites manifests an inability to potentially keep government secrets. The Office of Career Students received this warning from an alumnus and consequently notified the student body.

The e-mail said, "The documents released during the past few months through Wikileaks are still considered classified documents. He recommends that you DO NOT post links to these documents nor make comments on social media sites such as Facebook or through Twitter. Engaging in these activities would call into question your ability to deal with confidential information, which is part of most positions with the federal government."

I've always considered government positions rather tempting. Bureaucracy is sexy. Lord knows, my Inbox is flooded every day with fantastic offers from the White House. So hopefully The Prox doesn't count as a social networking site and I will not have to give up all my job offers. I suppose we will see soon enough! So here goes...

-The Blogstress

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Videogames at School = Bad News Bears

By Jacob Reses '13

Last year, I schlepped my Xbox 360 with me to school, figuring that I might turn it on occasionally for a round of Call of Duty with friends from home over Xbox Live. By the end of the year, though, I’d barely gotten any use out of the thing. It served as little more than an extra DVD player in my quad’s common room.
Given that the Xbox seemed to have had no impact on my productivity, I figured that I’d be safe bringing along my Wii this year. No dice. Word to the wise: If you want to get any work done here, it’s a bad idea to have easy access to pick-up-and-play Nintendo games. Unlike a lot of games on other platforms, which ostensibly demand longer play sessions, Nintendo’s efforts are deceptive time sinks. You go in thinking that you’re going to play one four minute level of Mario Bros. or one round of Wii Sports, and before you know it, you’ve been spending hours in front of the TV, having moved on to Mario Kart and Smash Bros.

I’ve been too busy for the last two weeks to allow myself to indulge too much, but now I’ve got my roommates hooked. One of them has spent ten hours and nine minutes on the machine in the last two days according to the Wii’s message board, and that figure is sure to go up before tomorrow.

Please, do yourselves a favor. Don’t ask for a Wii this holiday season. It’ll only cause you pain and suffering (and lost sleep). Get a 360 instead.

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Study Abroad Decreases in Popularity for First Time in 25 Years

By Morgan Jerkins '14

Upon arriving at Princeton, you may feel overwhelmed by all the opportunities and resources offered. Among these are a plethora of study and intern abroad options, from semesters at Oxford to internships with the Supreme Council of Antiquities. Judging from the “Student Voices” link on the Office of International Programs (OIP) website, the programs are highly reputed. Unfortunately for the rest of America, however, the interest is non-existent.The Open Doors Report on International Education Exchange reported that the number of American students studying abroad has declined for the first time in 25 years.

The poor economy was cited as the reason for the drastic drop, yet the report said that those who acquire experience in global competition flourish even in a floundering job market. Multinational companies seek graduates with international experience. Whether the experience lasted for three months or a year, the cultural and intellectual growth is extremely valuable. In fact, studies have also shown that “budding internationalists have an improved academic performance, higher graduation rates, and improved cultural practices and context compared to students in control groups.”

Stacie Nevadomski Berdan of the Huffington Post advocates for colleges and universities across the nation to provide financial assistance to students interested in programs overseas. Even though Princeton has an endowment worth billions, I ask you: Do you truly believe that the university provides enough aid for study abroad?

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Dear Santa...Love, Princeton

By Kelsey Zimmerman '13

The holiday commercials seem to have started exceptionally early this year. Days before Thanksgiving, cars tied in giant red bows and Santas graced the commercials on primteime television. Several radio stations started playing Christmas songs the day before Thanksgiving. Of course, it would be remiss to mention Starbucks, as it’s been all holida-fied since the beginning of November.

All these reoccurring reminders of the holidays started me thinking about the gifts I’m purchasing for family and friends in the next couple of weeks. Then I started wondering-if Princeton could have wish list for what it wants for the holidays, what would be on it? It might go something like this…

Dear Santa,

I’ve been a very good University this year. I’ve been focused on educating the 5,000 odd students here and have done a darn good job on it! Here is my wish list for this year…
Air-conditioning for the dorms- the students have already have enough to worry about without living in hot, stuffy dorms during warmer months.
A new gym- Dillon is small, cramped, and smelly. A renovation of the entire building would not be remiss and maybe add in a couple of those cardio machines with personal TVs.
More coffee shops- the ones on Nassau Street are overcrowded already. Let’s put one in every dorm!
Segways for all the students- walking takes too long and bikes require too much physical exertion. This is a much cooler and more convenient way to get to classes!
A dining hall for the squirrels- this way, they would stop getting in everyone’s way on the sidewalks and road while searching for food!


Love,

Princeton University- your fav Ivy!

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Giving Thanks in the Stacks

I won't lie, senior Adam Bradlow's blog post made me nervous. As I edited his convincing plea for more graduation tickets, I realized I had no such concern, despite my large family. Why? Thesis. The inhibitor suppressing my view of my future self on the podium, shaking some hands, tripping over a long gown.

My thesis has been a nebulous noun at best for far too long. Funding sent me to exotic Ithaca in upstate New York, to use Cornell's Rare Manuscripts Library. It was a chilling experience, complete with nights alone in a sketchy Holiday Inn, and not very fruitful.

Upon returning, I became acquainted with my carrel. The writing on its walls and vicious pin pricks in its cork boards reminded me of finger nail scrapings on the stone walls of early modern prison cells.

And as I sat in that carrel, it dawned on me that I don't even know what research is. I produced 60 pages of JP last year, yet I still do not know what research is.

Canceling dinner with friends due to nerves and bumbling around Firestone C level this evening, I bumbled right into the professor who inspired me to become a History major. An inspirational professor and person who is on academic leave this year, he asked me what I was writing for my thesis. I replied, "I wish I knew." We chuckled. But then I started to explain to him my ideas, and he appeared to be transfixed.

He took forty minutes to assure me of the topic's worth and appeared to be genuinely excited at the direction in which I was heading. I don't know how he pulled it off. But this year, I am thankful for stack C-15-N. I was always convinced that Princeton must have Hogwart's equivalent of the Room of Requirement. Now I know this is C-15-N in Firestone. For all you seniors in need of thesis encouragement, stagger around C floor a bit and you'll find the Stack of Support.

I won't start scrounging for extra graduation tickets yet, they're all yours Adam! But I am thankful for the slightly less obscured vision of my tumble across the stage, and most importantly, my highly anticipated game of thumb war with Shirley.

Happy almost Thanksgiving, all! Remember, mass murder of tofurkies is highly encouraged.

-The Blogstress

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Needy for Graduation Tickets

By Adam Bradlow '11

Recently it dawned on me that one day, I might actually graduate—and should probably start making arrangements for graduation ceremonies. I assumed that Princeton—the family-friendly University that it is—would supply more than enough tickets for all my family members. Wrong. For Commencement Day, the ‘actual’ graduation ceremony, each senior gets a total of five tickets—which spells trouble for those of us who are fortunate enough to have a number of parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins who would like to attend. For those of you who have not started looking into graduation details, it turns out that graduation is actually a three-day event at Princeton: first is baccalaureate, followed by class day, and Commencement is the final day. Unfortunately, tickets are in short supply at all of these events: seniors get two tickets for the first day, four for the second, and five for the third.

Associate Dean of Undergraduate Students Thomas Dunne explained to me in an e-mail that, “The number of tickets is determined by the size of the sites/venues. In most if not all cases we have maximized the seating at all the traditional locations. There are standing room locations at many of these events (outside the fence on walkways at the Cannon Green site for example). Also, once the ceremony starts we work to seat any guests who may not have tickets but could fill an empty seat.”

I trust Dean Dunne when he says that there simply isn’t any room—I’m sure that the University is working as hard as possible to maximize the number of tickets per senior. But, there simply aren’t enough tickets for many students. One solution might be to move the venue. If I have to choose between not allowing family members at my graduation and holding the ceremonies at the less-than-spectacular Princeton Stadium, I’d choose the latter.

Another solution might be to set up an official ‘ticket-exchange’ between the senior class. Many seniors—particularly those with international families—will not need all of their tickets and would probably happily give their tickets away. Unfortunately, there is currently no easy way for ticket-needy seniors to identify less needy ones. And, on that note, let me end by saying that I am definitely a ticket-needy senior. If you have some extra tickets, drop me a line.

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Black Squirrels, an Alumni Gift

By Monica Greco '13

There are several legends associated with our black squirrels here on campus. One credits their existence to a squirrel lab break, so to speak, and another to an experiment gone awry. Skeptics point out that black squirrels aren’t all that uncommon to begin with. There’s truth in this. I’ve seen black squirrels in New York too, though only in certain parks. (And no, I did not mistake rats for squirrels, take my word for it.)

However, the explanation that I’d prefer to believe is as follows: black squirrels were introduced into the Princeton “environment” as a gift from the esteemed and incredibly generous alumnus, Moses Taylor Pyne.
Legend has it that he sponsored the introduction of both black and orange squirrels, but the orange squirrels have since died out. This is perhaps a gross demonstration of school spirit—but I like it.
However, it makes me curious about other things, in particular, the ladybugs that made homes out of my windowsill last year. These ladybugs also happen to be reppin’ some Princeton school spirit, with their very distinct orange and black coloring. A coincidence? Perhaps, but I’d like to think not! In Princeton v. Mother Nature, it seems so far that we’ve got the upper hand.

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Harry Potter 7 Part 1. Emma Watson Has Grown Up Well

By Claudia Park '13

I arrived at the Hamilton AMC theater with a couple friends at 11:20 p.m. While impatiently waiting for midnight, we bummed around in the main lobby to admire the eclectic mélange of Harry Potter fans loitering around the room. Truly, the creativity die-hard HP fans employed for the making of their costumes was impressive (they certainly put my measly Gryffindor shirt to shame). We decided to bestow the award of best dressed to a group of high school students proudly lugging around their necks large intricately decorated cardboard boxes in the guise of a Floo Powder Network. Genius.Around 11:45 p.m., we made our way to our seats. Big mistake in waiting until then to stake our spots, as every single theater showing HP (at the very least 10) was packed. Disgruntled, we ended splitting up, but all was well since we were in the same theater, and most importantly, going to see the much, much anticipated HP7. Movie finally began, and the theater erupted into applause, screams, and “OH MY GOD!”

To be quite frank, and I do not know whether this is a result of my belief that the movies will never surpass the books, I wasn’t too swept away by the film. I found myself laughing at parts of the movie that I wasn’t sure were intended to be humorous – most ostensibly, the romantic development scenes. Was it me, or were the scenes with Harry and Ginny, and more conspicuously, with Ron and Hermione, forced and just awkward? Note: Ginny, the zipper trick was clever, and I will keep it in mind as future reference for pick-ups.

After the 2 hours and 30 minutes, I emerged from the theater confused and ambivalent about my feelings about the film. On the car-ride home at 3 in the morning, we held a very serious discussion on the merits of the film. I now present some conclusions:

-HP7 part 2 has much to live up to seeing that so much has yet to happen (I’m not even sure part 1 hit the halfway mark in the book).
-My belief that Rupert Grint was the best casted among the trio of Ron, Hermione, and Harry still holds.
-Dobby, as my friend put it, is a “boss.”
-Emma Watson has certainly grown up well, resulting in my sneaking suspicions that this film may oftentimes appeal more to the male audience.
-Certain moments of suspense in the film were well-filmed – I missed one part of the film as I had to cover my eyes.
-I am sad that Snape did not figure more prominently within this film and eagerly anticipate and expect his character development in part 2.
-Despite my lukewarm response to the film, I do not at all regret attending the HP7 midnight premiere, and plan to do so again for part 2 to be released July 15.


For my safety from possible devoted and exuberant HP7 fans on campus, I would like to say that I am not in any way adamantly forcing my opinions on anyone. I am open to hearing different opinions and look forward to heartfelt HP discussions (in the appropriate setting of Rocky/Mathey?).

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USG Senate candidate touts PCP agenda, walks back statement

By Lauren Zumbach '13

In an e-mail to the Princeton Committee on Palestine Listserv, Dylan Ackerman ’14, a candidate for USG class senator, promoted his candidacy as an opportunity to advance the organization’s agenda, a talking point he did not mention in his official campaign materials. Ackerman wrote that his candidacy is “a great opportunity for us as a club, to keep such issues on the table even if the petition/referendum process fails," referring to the PCP-organized referendum calling for Dining Services to provide an alternative to Sabra Hummus. The referendum will appear on the same ballot as the Senate elections.

Upon learning that his e-mail had circulated outside PCP, Ackerman sent an e-mail to The Daily Princetonian seeking to clarify words that he says were misconstrued. Ackerman said he wanted to explain to PCP members that he wasn’t helping with the petition process because he was too busy with his own campaign. He said he would not bring up pro-Palestinian or other political issues in the Senate, but wanted to clarify his position if further action on a failed boycott were to come up.

Below are parts of both e-mails:

Nov. 15 e-mail to PCP Listserv:

"Unfortunately I have not met most of you, as most of our business with PCP is done via e-mail, but I am running to be the Freshmen Class (2014) Senator. I consider this a great opportunity for us as a club, to keep such issues on the table even if the petition/referendum process fails. If you're a freshmen, I hope that you will vote for me, and I hope everyone else can spread the word about my candidacy to other people that they know around campus. I feel I have some very good ideas that I can bring to USG, both involving the work PCP has been doing and elsewhere."

Nov. 19 e-mail to The Daily Princetonian:

"It has been brought to my attention that an e-mail I sent to a campus organization I am involved with, the Princeton Committee on Palestine, has been forward to your office and others on campus, and has caused a fair amount of controversy. I ask that before you write about anything said in it, that you will be willing to hear my side of the story as I attempt to clarify some of my words that I feel were misconstrued.

First, I would like to clarify the intent of my e-mail. PCP operates mostly through online communication, and I do not know the vast majority of its members. My e-mail was intended to alert people likely to vote for me of my candidacy. I understand that some of my words can be misinterpreted as to assume that I would further push a failed Sabra boycott in the Senate. This was not my attention and is in no way what I intend to do if elected. First, I wanted to explain to the other members of PCP why I was not helping with the petition process, as I was simply too busy with my own campaign. Secondly, I wanted the other members of PCP to understand that in light of such an issue coming to the Senate, what opinion I would hold. I do not, however, have any attention of bring such issues to USG discussions.

Secondly, my support of the petition was not in order to boycott Israel. I am one of several members who advocated changing the wording of the petition from a boycott to the desire for an alternative brand. I do not oppose the nation of Israel. I simply feel that many people have overlooked human rights abuses carried out by one particular brigade. My principle reason in supporting the petition was to raise awareness about human rights abuses, educate the students about the situation in Israel, and help foster a discussion on campus about that situation.

Third, I am not running for USG Senate as any sort of political candidate. My USG platform and my reasons for running only concern matters on the Princeton campus and the immediate surrounding area. USG’s purpose is to represent the students; I believe completely that it should never be used as a vehicle for outside political movements. As mentioned above, I have no intention of bringing up Pro-Palestinian issues, or any other political issues if elected.

Lastly, I do not agree that my association with any on campus organization can or does demonstrate how I will operate if elected Senator. Other candidates running are members of Tigers for Israel, Campus Democrats, Princeton Faith and Action, and other organizations that could potentially endorse USG petitions as well. Simply being a member of such an organization does not mean that you support all of there actions now in the past."

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Jaguar vs. Anaconda, a Deadly Fight, a Princeton Metaphor?

As Princeton students, we face many challenges, most in the form of exotic wild predators. If you haven't run over an anaconda on your bike at least once on your way to class, I don't know how you do it. However, rather than complain about this wild snake infestation, we should take a leaf out of this jaguar's book and grab the anaconda by the throat. Also, if we start to view all of our problems in serpentine form, they become manageable. As felines, this is how we should handle everything, from vicious problem sets to preceptors who are under the impression that precept lasts an hour rather than 50 minutes.

-The Blogstress

ps- Note how the anaconda drags the jaguar into the water to give itself the terrain advantage. The jaguar eventually manages to pull the anaconda back onto land. An important lesson can be learned from this. Never let a problem set lead you into water. Even if it drags you there at first, insist on finishing it on the shore.

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Meg Whitman '77 Settles Suit with Former Housekeeper

By Jenna McCarthy '13

Meg Whitman ’77, who was defeated this month in the California governor’s race, paid $5,500 on Wednesday to settle a claim brought by her former housekeeper, Nicandra Diaz Santillan, according to the New York Times. Santillan was employed by Whitman for nine years and was fired in 2009 after Whitman discovered that she was in the country illegally. Santillan claimed that Whitman did not pay her for all of the hours she worked and fired her on the basis of political damage control. Tucker Bounds, a spokesman for Ms. Whitman, said that the accusations were baseless, but that, “this is simply the most practical and cost effective way to put the issue to rest.”

However, something interesting to note: according to Fox News, with the $140 million that Whitman spent on her gubernatorial campaign, she could have settled with 25,455 housekeepers!

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We Demand a Remodel!

By Morgan Jerkins '14

On this week’s episode of American’s Next Top Model, stoic Jane Randall ’12, one of the final four contestants, was determined to show her human side. Her goal was put to the test when Miss Jay sent the remaining contestants to Barbara Terrinoni, an acting coach. Now why, do you ask, should aspiring models learn how to act? Well, apparently, a model’s life is one big stage, aside from runways and platforms. A model has to adopt a persona and sharpen their personality skills in to land the big gigs. After this workshop, these ladies arrive at Vogue Italia headquarters to meet the magazine’s legendary editor-in-chief, Franca Sozzani.Sozzani believes that Jane is an attractive woman but lacks character in the face. Can this girl ever catch a break? Despite Jane attempting to impress Sozzani the best that she could, Chelsey won that particular challenge and brought Kayla along with her for a private viewing of Leonardo Da Vinci’s “Last Supper”.

For the next assignment, the girls went to Verona and were prompted to be dressed in the finest couture gowns for their photo shoots with Tyra, who was making her directorial debut. Ideally, Tyra wanted extreme sexuality and ultimately was dazzled by Jane’s change in character!

At the panel, Nigel commented that Jane was “less fluid” and Andre Leon Talley thought that Jane was censoring herself as if she were too restrained in her photos. As the judges were deliberating, Tyra argued on Jane’s behalf and said that Jane had a “million-dollar face.” Who would have thought Tyra would have hopped so far on board with the tiger in the end?

However, Talley still did not believe Jane was expressive in her shots. Two women were eliminated……and sadly, Jane was sent home. I guess if we learn one important thing from this experience, it’s that we should invite Talley rather than Tyra to support us during bicker discussions. But back to Jane. Although disappointed, she was proud of herself and her dreams of modeling still carry on. That’s the spirit!

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Being Green, Being Mean. My Foray into the Sustainability Fair

The journal “Psychological Science” published an article last year linking being green to being mean. The authors argue that wearing a “halo of green consumerism” makes one more likely to treat others with unkindness as well as to cheat and steal.

Since I believe everything I read, it wasn’t with a bounce in my step that I approached the Sustainability Fair today. The last thing I wanted was to be accosted by a Chancellor Green full of people telling me I wasn’t sustainable and trying to steal my umbrella. But I really wanted to win a trash sculpture, so I donned my camo and went.

Petrified that I would be recognized as the rogue green bean I am, I did my best to blend in. Neon green socks peeked out from my sneakers. I also wore a forest green jacket, green face paint, and even green underwear made of recycled plastic just in case there was a search for unsustainable apparel.

I passed the first checkpoint, the Sustainable Kettle Corn station. I nodded to the men behind the table, and thought I was safe to pass until one called out for me to halt. My heart racing, I stopped in my tracks. I knew I should just proceed without looking back. But I stopped. As I turned around, I prepared not for surrender, but to fight. I was close to ripping off my green jacket and hopping into ninja stance when the man turned out to merely be offering me a map to the sustainable scavenger hunt. He was actually pretty nice and allowed me to take his picture by the kettle corn with my cell phone camera. My cover wasn’t yet blown.

Inside, there were fabulous trash sculptures every way I turned. I was offered sustainable food and drink in exchange for signing up to receive e-mails from countless sustainable groups on campus. That California roll was definitely worth the ten e-mails I have already received from the Cauliflower Amnesty Association.

After making my way through each station, I felt myself transforming. I was no longer green just in attire, but in body and soul. After seeing the atrocities committed upon our environment at many of the booths, my heart began crying shards of plastic. These people weren’t mean, they were my friends!

But my transformation ground to a halt when I was offered a “sustainable” chicken appetizer. I became enraged with this man extending to me chicken in a plastic cup and asked him whether, if Jon Edward could bring back that chicken to talk to us, the chicken would say he had been treated sustainably. My face became less and less green and more and more red and soon I was yelling and crying and bach-bach-baching like a chicken. Screw the environment, save the chickens! That chicken in the cup wanted to be alive, not featured in a cup of goop at a sustainability fair!

That’s when security came and hauled me out of Chancellor Green and into the cold, dark night. I threw my bottle of Dasani into the trashcan in a last act of sustainable defiance and then went back to my room to clip my fingernails.

-The Blogstress

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Whitman College, A Hotbed of Killers

By Monica Greco '13

Unease is creeping through Whitman’s halls. You’ll find it in the dining hall, in the courtyard, and even hiding in the bathroom, as a roommate of mine discovered recently.

Maybe this unease isn’t as apparent to our visitors. Maybe you upper campus folk are unaware altogether-- but it is assassins season in Whitman, and this fact is hardly inconspicuous.
Indeed, it is perhaps a bit unnerving to get to the 3rd floor on the elevator and have the doors open up to an angry freshman with water gun in hand. It’s equally disconcerting to see a certain Professor/Master Harvey Rosen armed with a Friendly 538, loaded, leaking and ready to do damage.
Ah yes, but Prof. Rosen is a small fish in the world of assassins, foolishly strolling down the main path in Whitman in broad daylight. The more severe assassins you’ll find sleuthing about at night, interrogating their friends and acquaintances for information, sometimes smooth talking, sometimes being, well, a little gruff. One unarmed freshman was even caught in the bathroom, forced to defend herself with handfuls of toilet water.

Other students have taken the less aggressive route, resorting instead to dorm confinement or adopting extreme paranoia. There’s reason for this too. For instance, our ordinarily healthy, safe tradition of sharing extra food has taken a turn for the malicious. No—“pizza in the 2nd floor 1981 lounge” is no longer representative of earnest gastronomic altruism, but rather raises suspicion. The good people of Whitman are sometimes compassionate, however, warning their fellow Whitmanites over Whitmanwire, “it’s a trap!” But is it? When maliciousness abounds, who’s to say that this wasn’t an unceremonious attempt for one greedy Whitmanite to throw a wrench into our wonderful food sharing culture, or to keep all the pizza for himself?

The world of assassins is severe and impassioned, the assassins fierce, the people afraid, and the language peppered with allusions to John Wilkes Booth and Che Guevara.

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Penn IFC President Resigns after his Arrest at Penn-Princeton Football Game

By Claudia Park '13

On Saturday, Nov. 6, Interfraternity Council (IFC) president and current Penn Wharton senior Christian Lunoe was arrested at the Princeton-Penn football game. On Nov. 10, Lunoe resigned as IFC president.

Lunoe was arrested on the grounds of obstruction of justice and disorderly conduct. As Princeton Police Deputy Chief Charles Davall reports, he was caught with a “hydration pack with an alcoholic beverage, which was not permitted.” Furthermore, Davall attests to Lunoe’s lack of participation at the time of the arrest.

Investigations by Penn’s Office of Student Affairs/Fraternity Sorority Life are currently underway, entailing communication amongst Penn, IFC leaders, as well as the Princeton Police departments.

Lunoe’s first court hearing will occur this Tuesday, Nov. 16.

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Confessions of a Disaffected Young Democrat

By Adam Bradlow '11

I was raised in an intensely Democratic household—so much so that my mom once threatened to disown me if I tried to bring a Republican girl home for dinner. In high school, I volunteered for the Kerry campaign as well as campaigns for Democratic candidates for local and state elections. And, for winter break three years ago, two friends and I flew to Des Moines to knock on doors in freezing temperatures for then-Senator Barack Obama. I didn’t even think he was going to win—just three days before the Iowa Caucuses, I told my friend that the campaign was destined for failure. What kept us going us going in that crazy week leading up to Obama’s first big victory was caffeine, camaraderie and faith in the man himself. When he said that he was going to bring change to America, we believed him. January 3rd—the night that he won the victory that set him on a trajectory towards the White House—is probably the best day in my short political life.

Still, despite my strong Democratic roots and personal investment in the Obama presidency, I had a hard time convincing myself to vote in this past election: I never considered voting for the Republicans, but it just felt pointless to vote for the Democrats.

Starting in 2008, for the first time in a generation, the Democrats controlled both houses of Congress and the Presidency. This was the time to be bold. Instead, they were timid. The past two years have been deeply disappointing—from jobs, to environmental legislation, to LGBT rights—the Obama administration and the Democratic Congress seemed unable to address the pressing issues of our times. Even the healthcare and financial regulation bills were unsatisfying as the final products seemed more the products of special interests than principled legislators. Not only does the Democrats’ timidity over the past two years represent a failure for the country, but a breech of trust with their youngest foot soldiers.
If they are concerned about an ‘enthusiasm gap,’ they have only themselves to blame.

In October 2008, I invested my own time and money to knock on doors and make phone calls for Barack Obama’s campaign against John McCain. Two years later, I was barely able to drag myself to the polling booth. While I'm not happy the Democrats took a "shellacking," I can't help but feel that they earned it.

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Obscure Building Series: Stanhope Hall

By Jilly Chen '13

Quick, which is Stanhope Hall and which is Nassau Hall?

Many students would probably have difficulty correctly distinguishing the two, but this obscure building deserves some recognition. (By the way, Nassau is pictured on the left and Stanhope on the right.)

Built in 1803 and resembling the offspring of the more infamous Nassau Hall, Stanhope Hall currently houses the Center for African American Studies. Its humble appearance reveals a rich history and a variety of uses.

It is the third oldest building on campus, erected after University President Samuel Stanhope Smith grew weary of bombs and fires damaging Old Nassau and displacing students. Under different names, Stanhope Hall has served as a library, University offices and congregation grounds for the American Whig and the Cliosophic societies, the Almuni Council, Orange Key, and other student groups.

If all this history sounds scintillating, perhaps read the brilliantly titled book, The Center for African American Studies in Stanhope Hall. Otherwise, pay a visit to the historic structure or sign up for an AAS class to increase your chances of wandering inside.

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Send the President a CoalBama CoalGram for Christmas

By Jenna McCarthy '13

Getting a lump of coal for Christmas is no longer just a joke – a Chicago-based company has made it possible for anyone to order online and send a “holiday packaged coal gift” personalized with your own message.

CoalGram.com provides coal-based gag gifts and donates 15% of each sale to charity, so everyone can feel better about themselves by giving coal!


The original CoalGram is simply a piece of coal in a jewelry box, but you can also choose a Stocking Surprise CoalGram or Snowman Pouch Coal Gram.

Not sure if your family or friends would enjoy it? How about President Obama or a member of Congress? You can send a special lump to any political figure you desire. And don’t worry about the repercussions – CoalBama CoalGrams ship anonymously and for free.
To make things even better, the CoalBama CoalGram is only $10! It even comes with a patriotic ribbon.

The co-founder of CoalGram, David Barnes, said that they’ve made it easy for everyone to choose any congressman on their website. “I’m sure there will be no shortage of coal on its way to Washington D.C. this year, especially to Obama at the White House.”

So if you’re feeling upset about mid-term elections, don’t worry. You can always seek revenge on politicians through CoalGram.com!

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Tears Save Jane, Who Is Top 4 on ANTM

By Morgan Jerkins '14

During this week’s episode of “America’s Next Top Model," the five remaining contestants, one of whom is junior Jane Randall, did not have to strut down the usual runway but rather through the streets of Milan. And by strutting, I mean walking quickly yet stylishly. For the first assignment, the contestants had to make four appointments at different fashion houses---with one of them being the iconic Versace—and report back to the modeling agency by 6:30 pm or risk disqualification.Jane decided to pair up with Chris for the mini-competition. At their auditions for Versace, one of the executive directors said that Jane needed to work on her walk because it was not very good. Jane and Chris were far ahead of Chelsey and Kayla until a bone popped in Chris’s foot and she had to slow down. Because of this sudden impairment, the twosome lost the challenge. Now, Milan is a beacon of art for the international jet-set so the main challenge was to pose like statues with male models.

After Jay Manuel’s persistent questions as to why Jane could not show more passion and expression, our beloved tiger crumbled under the pressure and began to cry. But in the midst of this disillusionment, a glimmer of hope appeared. Jay Manuel was delighted to see Jane show raw emotion. At deliberations, Nigel Barker along with Andre Leon Talley and guest judge, Kyle Hagler, all agreed that Jane was too stiff, cold, and detached from actual emotion. When they questioned Jane about her performance, she broke down and like Jay Manuel, the judges were happy to see some emotion from her. Ultimately, her tears made her a “human being,” according to Tyra, and those tears proved to be her saving grace. Though she was in the bottom two, she was saved while Chris was eliminated. Until next time!

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Hey Undergraduate Admission, Profile Me!!! Pick Me!!!

Have any of you seen those Student Profiles on the Undergraduate Admission site? I know I stalk the hell out of them with an envious right clicker finger. Every year I write to Undergraduate Admission, begging them to profile me on their site. Why, you may ask? Aside from the narcissistic pleasure I would reap from seeing a gorgeous photo of myself plastered on the web, I also know I would contribute a vital element of diversity to the student group profiled. While almost all of the students on this site are pursuing certificates in finance while chairing at least two committees and participating in at least three extracurricular activities, there are many students on campus who just want to slide by without any Honor Code violations and the most respectable GPA they can tear from the tiger’s claws. Some students, like me, just want their mommies. Admission does not profile these students, but I think it would make high school seniors a lot more comfortable in applying if they see that sometimes the Admission committee slips up and accepts someone who doesn’t quite fit into the Princeton mold. So throw in an app, there’s hope for everyone! After all, not everyone can have the quintessential Princeton experience. That’s diversity!

But Undergraduate Admission won’t post my profile, so I’ll just momentarily take advantage of my position as sole arbiter of the Prox’s content and post it myself.

The Blogstress ’11
Scotch Plains, NJ

The Blogstress ’11 came to Princeton because it was her best acceptance and just swallowed up the fact that it was only 50 minutes away from home.

From the age of seven, she practiced violin and in middle school, she started learning the viola. After devoting countless hours of practice and playing in heaven knows how many orchestras, she tried out for the Princeton University Orchestra her first week of freshman year and was promptly rejected. But at least the conductor took the time to sneer at her.

After playing ultimate Frisbee with Lady Clockwork for a year and a half, she realized she hated the game and quit. But fortunately, she met her future roommates and best friends on the team so it wasn’t a total loss.

But let’s move on from the extracurricular activities, because The Blogstress came to Princeton with academics as her primary focus. Hoping to pursue a health-oriented profession, she loaded her schedule up with pre-med requirements and busted her back to nail the average on the head as often as possible. Seeing herself firmly ensconced in the bulky portion of the bell curve was always a cause for a celebratory sigh of relief before cracking open the orgo text again.

The Blogstress has made terrible errors in course selection almost every single semester and will not graduate with a single certificate in anything. Perhaps Alex Rosen ’11 will lend her one of his, as his Admission Profile seems to indicate he can spare one.

The Blogstress has encountered so many sadistic preceptors and professors over her seven semesters here that she has lost count completely. She now fully understands that success in the humanities and social sciences is based on either one of two things. 1. How successfully you flirt with your preceptor or 2. The Stair Method. (Preceptor closes eyes and throws all papers onto the stairs, labeled A-, B+, B, B, B-, B-, B-, C, C, C. Your grade depends on which step your paper lands on).

At this point in her college career, she really just wants her mommy. She wants to go home, cuddle her golden retriever, take a nap and then wake up as Julia Vill ’12, who plans on majoring in economics and is pursuing a finance certificate while also being an accomplished dancer. Or perhaps as Ashley Mitchell ’11, who also seems to have her act together according to the Student Profiles.

If the Blogstress takes away one piece of knowledge at graduation, it will be that she wants to be her own boss. She will not kowtow to a preceptor/professor disguised in business casual to determine her level of self-satisfaction. She has realized that it is much better to be the one passing judgment upon others rather than to be the one bearing the brunt of such decisions. But nonetheless, she will slosh through the rest of this year, and hopefully leave this University with a diploma and a few friends with whom to recall her good ol’ college days years down the road.

Love and kisses,

The Blogstress

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